Do you ever find it difficult to get into another romantic relationship or even embrace it? Are constantly been haunted by the experiences of your past relationship(s)? These are signs you’re stuck in the past. It is not an uncommon challenge for many, especially when all the hurt from the past blindfolds you from seeing new and wonderful opportunities ahead. It is therefore important to know that being stuck in a previous relationship can be detrimental, in almost all aspects of your everyday life, and growing past it is very important for your mental health and your growth.
Moving on from a bad past relationship often turns out to be a lot of work and a long process. It usually requires time, patience, and self-reflection. When unsolved feelings from a past relationship start affecting the present one, it’s crucial to recognize the signs and address them.
Here are 6 signs that you’re still living in the past and how to solve them.
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If you’re constantly bringing up discussions involving your ex in conversations with people or your new partner, anyone would easily see that you haven’t moved on fully. Although it is not uncommon to bring up former partners’ discussions in conversations. However, mentioning them more frequently is one of the clear signs you’re stuck in the past; they are still living in your head rent-free. These talks could come in different forms. It could even come in the form of constantly criticizing them negatively. If you intend to move on or heal from a previous relationship, stop bringing up your ex in conversations.
Not that easy right? You could start practicing to do that by first disciplining yourself. Agree that you won’t talk about them for a whole day. That way, you can be sure to start growing without them in your memory.
Bursting out angrily and emotionally at every given opportunity when their memory crosses your mind, especially when you remember how much you invested in the relationship. These signs indicate that you’ve not moved on and you’re stuck in the past. These emotional outbursts can be overwhelming, confusing, and draining because they affect your moods and interactions with others.
As much as you can, quit being angry and sad each time you remember your ex. Think of your previously broken relationship as an opportunity to find a better partner who has everything you ever wanted in a partner and a relationship.
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Dismissing the idea of dating once again because it seems no one is to be compared to your ex is one of the other clear signs that you’re still stuck in the past. This mindset can prevent you from seeing the good in other people and keep you in constant loneliness and nostalgia.
You need to understand that everyone is not like your ex and that there are people out there who are way better than your ex and are willing to treat you better just the way you’ve always wanted to be treated.
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Keeping track of your ex is a clear indication that you haven’t moved on or let go. This action can keep you glued to the past and prevent you from moving forward or seeing potential opportunities ahead of you.
Discipline yourself by trying to stay for the whole day without going to their profile. If you can, mute them for the time being until you’re stable. And after you’ve become stable, still make sure you’re not always keeping track of them on social media.
Research on human behavior has shown that comparison never benefits any relationship. Oftentimes, it leads to misunderstandings, insecurities, and mistrust. So when your ex is used as a yardstick for measuring every new person you come across, it is quite clear that your past is holding you down. This constant comparison can hinder you from seeing the other person’s peculiar features and character. Thereby, you end up ruining potential relationships before they have the chance to see the light of day.
The best thing to do is appreciate the other person for who they are. For once, try to see the good in them and how they make you feel comfortable. Understand that everyone has their unique qualities. Comparison will only destroy things. Don’t do it.
This is a common but very disastrous trait that some partners from previous relationships display. Truth is, they ain’t coming back. And if they would come back, it is not in your place to daydream about the comeback. Allow it to come when it should. These fantasies are damaging since they hinder you from getting into another relationship or even moving on.
Don’t daydream about wanting that toxic relationship back, understand the reason it ended in the first place. Seek new opportunities and possibilities. Look beyond the past, and look forward to a more promising future, better than what you’ve had; because you deserve the best and you deserve to be happy.
Moving on from the past can be difficult and emotional, whether it was you who ended the relationship or the other person. However, at the center of it all, letting go of the past can help you move on. Get in touch with yourself and open your heart to new and lasting love. Forget whatever has happened; let go of the past. There are brighter days ahead: brighter than you ever had.